Merry Christmas, Everyone!

An Onion Surprise For Valerie Guzman!

As part of the Wisconsin Book Festival this year my wife Laurie, seen above on the right, and I attended a panel discussion with 6 writers from the staff of The Onion, the wonderful satirical newspaper. It was a hysterically funny talk and I am extremely jealous of their work. We pick up a paper every week.

As some of you may know The Onion originated here in Madison, WI, before recently moving to New York due to their overwhelming popularity. Whenever they return to the Midwest they like to take pictures of their audiences since they find that Midwestern faces are more universal. They like to use them in the stories. So they made the offer. Anyone who wished could be photographed. They made no guarantees the pictures would ever be used.

Laurie decided she wanted to have her picture taken, but by the time we got to the line there were about 60 people in front of us. So we went for a walk down State St. Returning about a half hour later for another talk we saw the line had finally dwindled to 3 or 4. Laurie jumped in line and had her picture taken 4 or 5 times. I think they liked her.

We then forgot all about it.

Yesterday our son was out with some of his friends and they picked up a copy of this week's Onion.

"Dude, this picture looks like your mom," said his friend Tom.

Our son Shaun remembering the picture taking story said, "That is my mom."

"No, it really does look like your mom,' said Tom.

"No, that really is my mom!" said Shaun.

The title of the story is "Area Daughter Belittled Out of Concern" and is on the bottom of the front page, two stories down from "Weed Delivery Guy Saves Christmas". Laurie's comment was, "At least I'm not the weed delivery guy."

I have since sent the news to all of our relations and friends. We have no idea who the young woman is on the left or what the background is since Laurie was photographed against a blank wall. Never the less she is famous, at least her picture is.

Moral of the story: Be careful of what you wish for, it just might come true... all over the country.

www.theonion.com

A Delicious Marilyn

A visitor looks at a chocolate bust of Marilyn Monroe during the exhibition 'Chocolate -History, Business, Pleasure' in a museum in Erfurt, eastern Germany, Thursday, Dec. 9, 2004. (AP Photo/Jens Meyer)

Charity Of The Elvi At Christmas

The spirit of Christmas seems to be alive and well throughout the land.

from Business Wire

Las Vegas' very own, Trent Carlini, considered to be the world's best Elvis stylist (performer) came to say, "Thank you. Thank you very much."

Carlini brought hundreds of toys and gifts for all of the children at Las Vegas' Child Haven, a safe haven/refuge center for abused, abandoned and neglected children, ages 3 days to 17 years old. "Trent's holiday spirit brought so much joy to the kids at Child Haven and his encouraging words for the kids to find and follow their dreams was a great inspiration. The kids singing a few of Elvis' favorite songs, like 'Blue Christmas' and 'Hound Dog' was incredible!" stated Child Haven Manager Lou Palma.

Stated Carlini, "Many times, it's the nurses and caretakers of these children who are so often overlooked; and if anyone has ever had a child in the hospital, or away from them for any length of time, it's these special type of people that you want to acknowledge, specifically, for their unselfish love and tireless dedication in keeping the children safe, comfortable and happy, and we hope that we brought them a little joy during the holidays. To them we say, 'Thank you so very much.'"

Asked why Carlini does these kind gestures, he replied, "My band and I had a great run this year at the Las Vegas Hilton International where the King of Rock 'n' Roll himself performed his biggest concerts including his famous '68 comeback show; and, because we had literally thousands of people from Las Vegas and from around the world who came to support us, every year, we show our great appreciation by donating gifts to children who are in need, and we do this on our audiences' behalf."

http://home.businesswire.com/portal/site/altavista/index.jsp?ndmViewId=news_view&newsId=20041222005533&newsLang=en


from the Breeze Olney Times of Philadelphia

Who knew? Elvis knows Santa Claus.

The two celebrities performed at the same holiday party at Riverview Home, 7979 State Road. The party was coordinated by the Justice Frank J. Montemuro, Jr. Lodge #2193, Order of Sons of Italy in America.

"I've never been to an activity or event that kept their attention for so long," said Debbie Conway, recreation supervisor for the elderly and disabled residential care home. "I spent most of the time watching their reactions. It was a great event."

Elvis impersonator Michael Kubach and Jillian Feurer, a dancer and student at Rock School, entertained the audience alongside Santa's Elf Sharon Hill.

"They were singing, clapping, stirring up memories," said Naomi Maisonet, social worker.

http://www.newsgleaner.com/site/news.cfm?newsid=13608698&BRD=2340&PAG=461&dept_id=488595&rfi=6


from KCTV5 in WICHITA, Kan

Roy Helm's work wardrobe is a little more out there than most businessmen's. For one thing, he has a belt that weighs 10 pounds. It's part of one of his four Elvis costumes. Helm spends much of his time dressed up as Elvis.

Helm performed Wednesday for food service workers at Colwich Charter School. Kitchen manager Janice Hageman organized the concert for her staff. She came to know Helm through Shiloh Enterprises. Helm has sold the school cleaning supplies. When she learned Helm also performed, Hageman called him about performing for her staff. He put on a short Elvis concert.

"He's such a happy and nice guy that you can't help but love him," Hageman said.

At first, some of her staff was dubious about an Elvis impersonator. "You'd never think such an awesome voice would come out of such a short guy," Hageman said, chuckling.

Helm said the best part of what he does is helping people forget their problems for a while.

http://www.kctv5.com/global/story.asp?s=2724467&ClientType=Printable

'The Elves' Impersonator' rocks the holiday

It was certainly no blue Christmas when an Elvis elf visited Clinton Young Elementary [Perry Township, Indiana] last week.

The music department put on its annual holiday program Dec. 14 in the gymnasium. The string ensemble, directed by Catherine Radomski; band ensemble, directed by Brent Montgomery; and Ringing Lions and Singing Lions, both under the direction of Clinton Young music specialist Todd A. Pettit, performed musical selections.

The annual event featured the fifth-grade class performing its production of "The Elves' Impersonator." The musical set toes tapping to 1950s Elvis-style music while teaching lessons of acceptance, tolerance and respect. Set designs, lighting and costumes enhanced the production.

"This is a great experience for our students," Pettit said. "My hope is to give them a taste of what performing is really like in hopes that they will enjoy it enough to continue such musical activities in middle and high school and beyond."

The cast included all 122 fifth-graders.

LINKfrom indystar.com

Lighting Xmas - The Elvi Way

In Mahwah, the king of all displayers is well-known Elvis impersonator Tony Destro, who bedecks his house, a miniature version of Graceland. So many callers sought directions to the Victoria Lane house that police put a recorded message on their phone system. Police also set down cones to control traffic and issued passes to neighborhood residents, so they can bypass the hours-long line of people waiting to see Destro's lights.

Michael-Ann Floyd of Garden Court, whose house faces Destro's back yard, said some of the light- seers make noise or leave fast-food trash behind; when the lights are off, some even yell at Destro to turn them on. On the bright side, she said, it only lasts a few weeks. "The lights themselves are nice, but it's hard to live with," she said.

from The Star Ledger at NJ.com
http://www.nj.com/news/ledger/index.ssf?/base/news-19/110343975786210.xml

Elvis Bread?

What next?

"The 70th anniversary of Elvis Presley's birth is to be commemorated with a limited edition bread featuring his likeness.

Bakers Kingsmill have crafted special bread tins to recreate the famous "Love Me Tender" singer's profile - and the packaging will carry the slogan 'By appointment to the King.'

Kingsmill spokesperson Jo Sykes says, "What better tribute to the great man than to bake him his very own limited edition loaf, for everyone to enjoy."

The company has managed to avoid legal action being taken against them by Elvis Presley Enterprises through their use of look-alikes for their $12.6 million TV commercials which show spoof footage of Presley as a baker."

I wrote to them asking if I might have a copy of some of their printed advertisements and they refused.  They are based in the UK.
http://www.krktcountry.com/script/headline_newsmanager.php?id=372783&feed_id=28&section_directory=
 

Elvis Celebrates Life

Joseph Creazzo's reverence for Presley blossomed into complete devotion after the Elvis imitator was seriously injured in a car wreck in 1990. Creazzo has been involved in two major automobile collisions and has required nearly two dozen surgeries as a result.

During one surgery for his back in 1992, Creazzo had a vision he'll never forget.

"There was a big shining light, and I couldn't reach it," Creazzo said. Beckoning him toward the light was his favorite musician. In the dream, Creazzo could only walk in place and could not reach Elvis.

"I couldn't get through that doorway," Creazzo said. "I wanted to, but I couldn't get there."

When he recovered from his operation, Creazzo was inspired to share his love of Elvis with the world. He sewed three Spandex bodysuits with metal studding reminiscent of Elvis. He started taking singing lessons five years ago. He now styles his hair and talks like Elvis. Impersonating Elvis has become Creazzo's way of life.

from the article by Rudy Miller for the Express-Times, New Jersey
http://www.nj.com/news/expresstimes/pa/index.ssf?/base/news-14/1102932313135460.xml

The Week in Elvis

During this week in 1957 Elvis received his draft notice.

In 1960 he is inducted into the Los Angeles Indian Tribal Council. The ceremony coincides with the opening of his movie "Flaming Star" in which he plays a half-breed.

Dueling Elvi

from the "Better Late Than Never" Folder.
The contest mentioned in the article was yesterday. I'll see if I can find out who won.

Elvis - both of him - has entered the building. There are hundreds of Elvis impersonators in the world. At the All Stars Sports Bar in Seabrook on Saturday night, it will come down to just two: the 1960s crooner Elvis, Ralph Brown of Seabrook; and 1970s Las Vegas Elvis, William "Elvis" Bishop of North Hampton.

The men will compete "American Idol" style for the "Undisputed Title of ‘The King’," and for a lavish Elvis-style belt that started the whole affair rolling.

The belt originally belonged to Bishop, who agreed to sell it to Brown for $50, knocking $25 off the price because the men knew each other. Before Brown paid Bishop, the belt broke.

"The night I put it on it broke in half," said Brown. Bishop claims Brown fiddled with the clasps and broke it.

Currently holding the piece is Brown’s friend, Phil Englehardt, owner of the Honey Bee in Seabrook and recent self-published author of "Motorcycle Man," a semi-autobiographical novel about the restless proprietor of a doughnut shop. If anyone could see a promotional event in such a dispute, it was Englehardt, who has been touring New England marketing his book. In tow has been Brown, who is mentioned in "Motorcycle Man."

The show’s $10 admission will benefit Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Seacoast.

from the Exeter News-Letter
http://www.seacoastonline.com/news/exeter/12102004/news/53181.htm

Elvis Microphone On Ebay

On Friday, the "e" in eBay stands for "Elvis."

A microphone used by KWKH radio for its legendary Louisiana Hayride program -- which is largely credited with launching Elvis Presley to stardom -- will be put up for bid that day in a live auction at the Beverly Hills, Calif., auction house Profiles in History, which specializes in movie, TV and music memorabilia.

Bidders around the world can participate in the auction, which starts at 3 p.m. CST, online via eBay.

Oh well, I'm out of the running, the starting bid is $10,000.

LINK for article in The Shreveport Times

eBay: www.ebay.com.
Profiles in History: http://www.profilesinhistory.com/.

Chad Hershner is the Paramount

Chad Hershner is getting ready for the grand opening of the Paramount Theater on December 15.

Under Hershner's guidance the Paramount project expanded from a $6.6 million stabilize-the-building endeavor to a $14 million vision of a state-of-the-art entertainment and educational venue...

Why here? I moved to Charlottesville in January 2001 when I was hired as the Executive Director of The Paramount Theater.

Worst about living here? Is there a worst thing? Charlottesville has so much to offer. It's a small town with a big-town feel.

People would be surprised to know? For fun, I used to be an Elvis impersonator and perform at birthday parties.

from The Hook, Charlottesville, VA http://readthehook.com/stories/2004/12/01/
hotseatMrSmilesParamountBo.html

Joseph Chavez

Just ask Joseph Chavez — it takes time and money to be the King. Well, like the King anyway.

Hanging on his walls, rhinestones glitter on blue and white jumpsuits accented by gold and red capes. Chavez is preparing to head out to a casino for an Elvis look-alike contest, and he means to win...

For nearly two years, the retired schoolteacher has been taking his Elvis impersonation to parties, casinos and senior citizen centers...

Chavez said his favorite venue remains the different senior citizen centers where he can see his audience members smiling in remembrance.

"They all tell me their stories about Elvis. How some of them have met him, what he was like. They'll say that Elvis really gave them one of his scarves at a show, or he gave them a hug. I get a lot of satisfaction from putting smiles on their faces. It keeps me going," he said. "Some ladies come up to me, tap me on the shoulder and say things in like, 'Hey, I thought that you passed away!' Another lady was picking at my costume and I realized she was trying to steal one of the rhinestones off of my costume!"

from The Valencia County News-Bulletin, Belen, NM
http://www.news-bulletin.com/lavida/46874-12-01-04.html

The King In Bejing

His curling lips make women swoon. He's got the sideburns, the patent suit and the 55-pound belt buckle. He's got one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and he's set to go.

No, it's not "King of Rock and Roll". It is Martin Fontaine, a red-headed French Canadian who will play The King in 'The Elvis Story,' to debut this Thursday at the Poly Theatre. The musical tribute is the only full-length musical production that recreates the life, times and music of Elvis Presley, from his discovery at Sun Records in Memphis, through his swinging Hollywood heyday, to his final years as a Vegas icon.

As the only performer to receive authorization from Elvis' family to play the icon on stage, Martin Fontaine has played the lead an astounding 1,000 times since 1995, which has earned him huge fame and recognition. That may make him a hound dog, but Fontaine insists it doesn't make him an Elvis impersonator.

"I'm an actor-singer playing the role of Elvis on stage," says the star.

"When I arrive at the theatre, I transform into Elvis. I show the young, energetic, shy, unsure-of-himself Elvis. That's my job on stage. But offstage, people don't see me as Elvis. If you passed me on the street, you might think I look like an accountant."

LINK